Monday, May 13, 2013

It was only a matter of time... The introvert opens up.

And here I am, after a hiatus of quite a few years! I'm turning a new leaf, as I've turned many in my life, from going blog-less, to getting married, to excelling in my dream job as a web/interactive designer and developer. That gets me to the motivation for this entry (my re-entry)!

Those who know me have heard the philosophical waxing and romanticizing of an introvert's life. I've even addressed being an introvert in the workplace. So, here I sit reviewing my career "Five Year Plan", and I'm a little taken aback to realize that it involves me operating quite a bit more out of my comfort zone than I am at current. You see, I hope to one day be one of those folks who rallies the troops and inspires others to give their best for the team and organization. You know: a supervisor, manager or something to that effect!

It's not that I haven't exercised those skills before (my college film co-stars can attest), or that I'm totally oblivious to my potential or talents with people. There's just been a couple of issues related to God's timing, honestly, that have postponed such a job title.

For one, I've been having the time of my life honing technical skills and contributing to really big projects on a very detail-oriented level. I LOVE going to work every day: designing, coding, having my hands (and brains) in the technical minutiae of front-end web development. You know you love your job when you ask the wife for occasional permission to do work at home, for fun (after a full day), and on any given day leisure reading includes blog content from some of the greatest web design minds out there. As a result, I've been prospered to add some value to my team and organization. But, I've realized something... I spend an awful lot of time completely tuned out and in my own world problem-solving. Now, I know, there's nothing necessarily wrong with that--those types of jobs and individuals are important. That's totally me--that's always been me--the introvert and creative who can entertain himself for hours and not miss the rest of the world. The problem is, that's not *all* there is to me. As much as I fail to show it often enough, I really love people, and I've been reminded that we *all* come most alive when we have quality interactions with others. Whether it's just one person, two, or twenty, we all enjoy doing life with others--no man is completely an island unto himself.

That gets me to the second issue, brought to light at the recent Top Gun Men's Conference, organized by Zoweh Ministries. I've bought into some untruths (as we all have at times) that it has to be this way or that... in the sense that being "quiet" equates to having a small personality. That being observant or meditative (ironically) suggests that one doesn't have much to say. That being respectful, or careful, means that one necessarily needs permission to speak up. I've made strides over the years, but it's still great work sometimes to be reminded of God's permission to share the full wealth of personality that I have--who God made me to be. That, it's not only OK to live from a full and healthy heart, but that the world needs it!

I need reminders and God's encouragement every day :), though I'm glad to know Whose I am: Who made me and hides this quirky and fun person and life within Himself (Colossian 3:3).

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